The Stepford Village -Saturday, May 29, 2004 -12:20 am-
Disney created Celebration, an entire community for people who don't live there. Celebration is at the junction of I-4 ad FL-192. It's composed entirely of buildings so individual they all look exactly alike. It has exactly one of everything. One bank, one movie theatre, one Japanese restaurant, one ice cream parlor, one relator, one fire station, one dry goods store, and everyone drives eggs. So really there's a lot of eggs, but everyone has one. The eggs are to golf carts what a Segway is to the scooter you had as a kid. I don't think anyone really lives in Celebration. It would spoil the perfection of the image. Even the people who stay there year-round just kind of have their stuff in long term storage in their attic. Driving through it is a very odd experience. It's a kind of horrific post-modern performance art piece writ large. It feels exactly like any one of Disney's other rides (It's a Small World, Pirates of the Caribbean, or The Energy Pavilion) and somehow a fake version of life is the theme. If you'd like to enjoy the Celebration experience without travelling all the way to Florida, just watch any 1950's anti-Communist propaganda film. Remember, the milkman always knocks twice.